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Northern Territory Floods So Bad That Crocodiles Are Now Commuting 

Police urge residents to stay indoors, which is also where the spiders are.

Drew Curtis

Interstellar Comet Has So Much Methanol It Could Be Kentucky’s Official State Bird

Alien visitor contains more alcohol than almost any comet in our solar system, raising questions about what exactly is going on out there and whether or not we can get invited to it.

Drew Curtis

Department of Defense Hungers for War, $7M of Lobster in $93B Spending Spree

The Pentagon sure seems like they’re being a bit shellfish.

Bram Teitelman

Vermont Man Solves the Backup Camera Crisis Nobody Knew We Were Having

A bold new solution for the age-old problem of “I could wipe it… but what if I simply didn’t?”

Drew Curtis

Komodo Dragon Chows Down On Stuffed Animals

Because why hug a stuffed animal when you can stuff yourself with one or two?

Bram Teitelman

Vatican Exorcism School Adds AI Module to Annual Demon-Fighting Curriculum

Participants will also hear from a woman who became possessed and started speaking Arabic, which exorcists say is less common than Latin but still gets you flagged at airports

Drew Curtis

Iowa County Supervisor Discovers Word Has Racist Meaning; Remains Skeptical

Area man shocked that “things we’ve always said on the farm” are not a recognized legal defense.

Drew Curtis

Pyongyang Marathon Cancelled Due to “Some Reasons”

Tour company promises to investigate what “some reasons” means, beginning with several polite emails into the void.

Drew Curtis