Russia Claims The Moon as Sovereign Territory

Russia says it will carve out sovereign lunar territory by 2036, violating a treaty it signed in 1967, which still puts it ahead of the 1994 Budapest Memorandum speedrun by a comfortable margin.

US Treasury Department Says Cuba May Not Receive Oil Shipment From Russia

Secret Service put on high alert?

Fish Sticks Are Funding Russia’s War on Ukraine. And You Should Feel Bad 

The frozen food aisle has entered its Cold War era, and your air fryer is now complicit.

Ukraine Hits Russian Target 800 Miles Away With New Homemade Cruise Missile Built From Airplane Scrap

When your war machine becomes its own parts supplier, that’s less a setback and more a very awkward recycling program.

Russian Company Develops Brain-Controlled Spy Pigeons, Promises They’re Only for Peaceful Purposes

Finally, paranoid schizophrenics will have the validation they never wanted.

Russia Plans Porn Ban for Single Women To Force Them to Birth More Cannon Fodder for Future Wars

The Kremlin bravely confronts its greatest military threat yet: Wi-Fi and a locked bedroom door.

Barron Trump’s Long-Distance Girlfriend Used Disappearing Messages, Spoke Russian, and Was Dating Another Russian

Somewhere a retired CIA case officer is screaming into a pillow.

Russia Unveils “Next-Generation” Horse-Powered Satellite Uplink

Yes, this is real.

Ukraine Denies Drone Attack on Putin Residence but Thanks Russia for Excellent Suggestion

“We’ll get right on that,” said Zelensky.

Russia Debuts AI Robot That Immediately Face-Plants to the Theme of Rocky

This marks the first time in history something Russian has gone down to "Eye of the Tiger" without performance-enhancing drugs.