Pyongyang Adopts Mandatory Automatic Nuclear Retaliation Policy After Watching Iran’s Khamenei Get Epic Fury’d

Officials described the plan as “stabilizing,” somehow.

Ukraine’s National Police Lists Seagal Alongside Kim Jong Un and Assad as Illegal Arms Recipient

Pro-Kremlin separatist warlord hands out Glocks to Kim Jong Un, Bashar al-Assad, and Steven Seagal, because the Marked for Death program has loosened its eligibility requirements considerably.

Moscow plans Victory Day Parade Without Vehicles Because Ukraine Destroyed Them All

Kremlin debuts new “invisible military” strategy, hopes no one notices.

Ukraine to Field 25,000 Military Ground Robots in 2026 

Russia counters with new coal-powered reconnaissance horse.

Hungarian Ministry of Defence Information-Security Officer Used the Password “FrankLampard”

A colonel in charge of protecting classified military data chose the name of an English football manager. 

North Korean Applicant for Remote Crypto Job Refuses To Repeat the Phrase ‘Kim Jong Un Is a Fat Ugly Pig.’

Voight-Kampff test finally goes open-source.

NATO Ally Denmark Was Prepared To Destroy Its Own Runways To Stop a US Invasion

Imagine telling your 2015 self that.

How Soon Is “Nah’; Morrissey Cancels Another Show

This time on account of other people having fun.

How Viral Slop Reanimated the USS Ford Toilet Crisis

A weeks-old story about the USS Ford's plumbing goes viral again after passing through the internet's own sewage system, arriving on the other end unrecognizable and smelling much worse.

Cuba: Close, but No Cigar Festival

Cuba postpones luxury tobacco gala to "preserve excellence," but there’s more to it than that.