Disclaimer: This article is based on actual news from the real world – honestly! However, it has been sprinkled with a healthy dose of satire.
I'd like to speak to the meownager. (lienyuan lee/Creative Commons)
If you’ve ever traveled with your pet, you know that sometimes it can be a hassle to find a place to stay that will take them. Maybe you just leave Fluffy or Spike at home and get someone to check in on them. Perhaps you board them. Or you could just not say anything and hope everyone turns a blind eye. That’s what one lady did in Farmington Hills, MI, where she was found with 53 cats in one room.
It all started with a hotel guest noticing about a dozen cats sitting around outside a room. Parker Davis said that he saw more inside the room at the Motel 6. “Smelled cat pee really strong,” he told Fox2. “I thought that was strange.” Smelling cat pee at a motel is nothing out of the ordinary. A hotel, on the other hand, has slightly higher standards. However, Davis, who must be a dog person, thought otherwise and called the police.
He said the woman in the room wasn’t happy about that and kept trying to smack the phone out of his hand. We’re going to overgeneralize for a second here. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with owning a cat. And the same thing goes for two cats. They’re like children – why have just one when you can get another one, so the first has someone to play with? Three, you’re starting to flirt with “crazy cat person” behavior. If you have upwards of ten, congrats, you’re a crazy cat person!
And while she may not have been the most sane person, when the cops and animal control showed up, they gave the lady some credit. They stated that all the cats were in relatively good shape and had access to food, water, and litter boxes. In addition, the owner knew the names of all 53, including Mousie, Matilda, and Kevin, to name 5% of them. Sadly for her, nearly all 53 were taken away from her by animal control and will be available for adoption at Oakland County Animal Shelter and Pet Adoption Center in Pontiac, MI. However, she wasn’t charged, since they were taken care of, and she was even allowed to keep three, which makes her officially not a crazy cat person, as seen in the criteria in the last paragraph.
There’s no word on whether the cats’ caretaker is still staying at the Motel 6 in question, or if she’s now at a cathouse. There’s also no truth to the rumor that the establishment is changing its name to Motel 53. But at the end of the day, nobody got hurt, the cats will hopefully all wind up somewhere larger than a single hotel room, and it sure wasn’t the last time someone got a little Friskies at a motel.
This article is based on fully factual news, but if we got it wrong, blame these guys, we’re just here to make it funny.
