Black Bear Found Captaining Boat at Naples Sailing Club in Florida

In Naples, FL it seems to have rocked the community that the latest bare necessities for our grizzly neighbors now includes boat ownership. Many onlookers were surprised to see a black bear wandering around on board his catamaran, the oddly named TomCat, at Naples Sailing and Yacht Club last week, presumably getting it in shape for his next voyage.

The majority of locals seemed dubious about the fact that the bear was actually the owner of the boat, clearly adding to the stress and pressures bears face when transitioning to boat ownership. “I’ve seen alligators in the marina. I’ve seen dolphins, manatees, but I never saw a bear,” said Manny Blanco, general manager of the yacht club. Alligators have long been accepted into the boat ownership community, with dolphins and manatees gaining acceptance just last year, but it seems that there is still widespread prejudice when it comes to bears. 

The bear was first spotted swimming in the harbor before making his way to his boat, where he was said to be at the bar, before going about his boat duties – a non-story if this was a human, or alligator apparently, but sadly not so for a bear. People passing by on other boats, and those people walking by the yacht club could be seen taking photos and videos of the naked bear, a clear invasion of privacy, but it’s unfortunately a problem the bear community has faced since the day cameras were invented, whether in their natural wooded environment, or indeed on a 35-ft catamaran in Florida.

Odd News Show reporter, Harry Hanrahanrahan, arrived on the scene later in the day, and caught up with the bear wandering along 9th Street, presumably shopping for more supplies for his voyage, or maybe some clothes. He asked the bear if he had any comments, but the bear just shook his head, obviously disappointed that he should have to justify why he was on board his boat in the first place.

At first glance, Naples Police Department appeared to be helping the situation, posting on Facebook to ask residents not to call the police about the bear and to please just leave it alone as it prepares for its voyage, but they then backed up their message with an insulting picture of a putridly cute children’s teddy bear, smiling and waving at the camera, rather than something more appropriate to represent nature’s most magnificent beast, and how he is feeling about the unwanted attention.

ONS have also reached out to the bear rights organization, Bear Equality Acceptance and Representation (B.E.A.R.) for comments, and will update this story once we hear back from them. Which we probably won’t, as we just just made it up.