Disclaimer: This article is based on actual news from the real world – honestly! However, it has been sprinkled with a healthy dose of satire.
A man residing in Florida, where things are mostly normal, is leading a class-action lawsuit against Netflix because of streaming troubles that some experienced while trying to watch the epic, all-time classic fight between Mike Tyson and Jake Paul on November 15.
Even if a fight is dull, with very few landed punches, it's still possible to take a few photos that make it look like it was worth watching. (netflix/Instagram)
Glitches and buffering issues were among the problems mentioned in the suit, which is on behalf of thousands of people who allegedly had trouble watching the alleged fight.
“We’re genuine victims here,” said one person who had streaming trouble. “All we wanted to do was watch an internet personality beat up an old guy – you know, good, clean fun – and Netflix denied us that simple pleasure.”
A Netflix post on Instagram shortly after the fight bragged that “the boxing mega-event dominated social media, shattered records, and even had our buffering systems on the ropes.” There’s no word yet of any lawsuits against Netflix for calling the event a “boxing” match.
"Let's keep doing boring things in the ring a little longer, then this will be over and we can collect all the money." (netflix/Instagram)
Netflix said that over 100 million people worldwide watched the fight, which ended in a unanimous decision in favor of Paul against the 58-year-old Tyson, who hadn’t fought professionally in nearly 20 years. It was also unanimously decided that the actual fight was extremely uninteresting and that someone ought to file a suit against Netflix for nearly being bored to death.
“It was an okay fight,” said one longtime boxing fan, “although I was hoping for more action. The boxing industry has such a great history of integrity and ethical conduct, and I hope this doesn’t mar the sport in any way.”
