Sure they broke several laws and triggered mass panic, but was justice really necessary? (Niu Niu/Unsplash)
Satirical opinion by Jason Salmon, Odd News Show.
First and foremost, they apologized. Miguel Ruiz and Estrella Pereira did not mean to scare anyone at Devon Aire Kiddy College. The same way, I’m sure, that a Kiddy College does not mean to insinuate that it is in any way providing a collegiate level of higher education. And that’s what is hypocritical about this whole incident.
If parents can pretend they are sending their kids off to get a mini PHD, why can’t a couple of grown adults pretend to be assassins outside that same school? What the heck happened to Florida? Why, all of a sudden, are Floridians so sensitive to a couple of people just pretending to target a daycare center with high-powered rifles? When did the Sunshine State become Snowflake Central?
Turns out there are scary ways to wield firearms. (Ving Cam/Unsplash)
Once you hear Ruiz and Pereira’s side of the story, it becomes so much clearer.
“We’re bodybuilders and we’re into the social media thing,” Pereira told reporters. Isn’t it obvious? These are people who sculpt their physiques to the point where they could end a man with their bare hands. What better way to show that off to the world than to grab some guns and film yourself pointing them at daycare patrons. They obviously didn’t get to post it, but it’s hard to believe that wouldn’t have gone viral.
Pereira indicated that Ruiz also knew that, adding that he “thought it would be cool to take a picture with a gun, because with muscles and guns and it sounds really cool like if you look at a photograph like that.” That statement makes clear – with muscles, guns, photographs he might believe make actual sounds, and sentences that end in a kind of multiple choice – that Ruiz’s heart is in the right place. These people want to be famous, and in today’s world, that is all you need to be considered an influencer or comedian.
Apparently not everyone who looks like this is a genius. (Anastasia Maragos/Unsplash)
I’m sure some think Ruiz clearly wouldn’t even have the grades to get into a Kiddy Community College, but perhaps this has all just been an elaborate satire on his part.
…or on mine.
