Latest Posts from Bram Teitelman
Multiple Michael Myers Mar Massachusetts
"Yeah baby," said one confused Austin Powers cosplayer, shortly before being stabbed to death.
Bram Teitelman
Human Skull Hunt on Easter Goes About as Well as (Un)Planned
Let’s just say eggs weren’t the only things dyed at this park.
Bram Teitelman
World’s Oldest Tortoise in Crypto Scam
His death was reported, but it was all part of a crypto shell game.
Bram Teitelman
Drug Dealer Hit by Flying Bag of Cocaine
There’s more than one way to take a hit.
Bram Teitelman
Kat Burglars Steal 12 Tons of Chocolate
The klepto choco bandits are still on the loose and may be armed and extremely delicious.
Bram Teitelman
New Seafood Trend: Pretending It’s Meat
Your next surf and turf might look more like a turf and turf.
Bram Teitelman
Bug Tussle, TX, Stops Making Street Signs After Multiple Thefts
Big Trouble in little Bug Tussle.
Bram Teitelman
Dumb Waiter Robot Won’t Stop Dancing
The future is here, and boy does it enjoy cutting a rug.
Bram Teitelman
News Report on Bear Attack Interrupted by Bear
She continued the story, proving she was no cub reporter.
Bram Teitelman
Sharks Muddy the Green Waters in the Chicago River
St. Patrick only gets a day, but sharks have a whole week.
Bram Teitelman
How Soon Is “Nah’; Morrissey Cancels Another Show
This time on account of other people having fun.
Bram Teitelman
Department of Defense Hungers for War, $7M of Lobster in $93B Spending Spree
The Pentagon sure seems like they’re being a bit shellfish.
Bram Teitelman