Top Exorcist Fired for Saying Aliens Are Demons
Somewhere in the cosmos, actual aliens are reportedly offended by the comparison.
Drew Curtis
Top Exorcist Fired for Saying Aliens Are Demons
Somewhere in the cosmos, actual aliens are reportedly offended by the comparison.
Drew Curtis
Pope Leo Cites Gandalf in First Encyclical, Demands Humanity “Disarm” AI Before It Forges Any More Rings
Drew Curtis
God Hates Fiberglass Dinosaurs
Drew Curtis
Pope Leo Spent Formative Years Training With Clowns, Experience That Has Been Useful in Recent Months
Drew Curtis
Hegseth 25:17
Defense Secretary prays at the Pentagon with great vengeance and furious anger, which coincidentally is also how he was confirmed.
Drew Curtis
Pentagon Threatens Pope
Department of War to Holy See: Forgive us our trespasses, as we bomb those who trespass against us.
Drew Curtis
Hundreds of Active-Duty Military Report Their Superiors Are Too Enthusiastic About Ending the World
Turns out “chain of command” now includes someone who lives in the sky and hasn’t filed paperwork since 33 A.D.
Drew Curtis
Vatican Exorcism School Adds AI Module to Annual Demon-Fighting Curriculum
Participants will also hear from a woman who became possessed and started speaking Arabic, which exorcists say is less common than Latin but still gets you flagged at airports
Drew Curtis
Swedish Churches Discover “Nuns” Were Funding Putin’s War Machine One Tchotchke at a Time
What began as parish hospitality ended somewhere between espionage and Etsy treason.
Drew Curtis
Manila Woman Discovers Four Years of Daily Prayer Were Directed at 3D-Printed Shrek
Announces that she will continue worshipping the ogre.
Drew Curtis
Polymarket: Betting Against God Yields 5.5% Return
Somewhere between Revelation and a Robinhood app, capitalism found a new prophet.
Drew Curtis
Welsh Schoolboy Shows up to Nativity Play Dressed as Elvis Instead of an Elf
Although the “Elfis” sign suggests they knew what they were doing all along.
Drew Curtis
Eyeless, Faceless Horror Jesus Stolen From Nativity Scene
Area residents celebrate the first day in weeks without textile-induced Christmas night terrors.
Drew Curtis
Pastor Says Church Secretly Helps Everyone, Just Not the People Who Ask for Help
Or anyone who tells anyone about it.
Drew Curtis