Putin’s Unstoppable Hypersonic Missile Performs Flawlessly, Strikes Russian Shopping Mall
Moscow's latest marvel reached its destination with all the confidence of a GPS set to "chaos."
Drew Curtis
Moscow plans Victory Day Parade Without Vehicles Because Ukraine Destroyed Them All
Kremlin debuts new “invisible military” strategy, hopes no one notices.
Drew Curtis
Russia’s Supreme Court Adopts AI To Help Draft Rulings. Is Now Putting Glue on Pizza and Eating Rocks
In Russia, the algorithm is just another guy in the room nodding along.
Drew Curtis
Ukraine to Field 25,000 Military Ground Robots in 2026
Russia counters with new coal-powered reconnaissance horse.
Drew Curtis
Russia Claims The Moon as Sovereign Territory
Russia says it will carve out sovereign lunar territory by 2036, violating a treaty it signed in 1967, which still puts it ahead of the 1994 Budapest Memorandum speedrun by a comfortable margin.
Drew Curtis
Russian Company Develops Brain-Controlled Spy Pigeons, Promises They’re Only for Peaceful Purposes
Finally, paranoid schizophrenics will have the validation they never wanted.
Drew Curtis
Russia Unveils “Next-Generation” Horse-Powered Satellite Uplink
Yes, this is real.
Drew Curtis
Inside the Rapid Evolution and Explosive Origins of the Chernobyl Dogs
Nearly 40 years after the Chernobyl nuclear meltdown, generations of dogs live, devoid of human contact and riddled with radiation. Let's find out how that's going for them.
Kevin Bartini
Russia Debuts AI Robot That Immediately Face-Plants to the Theme of Rocky
This marks the first time in history something Russian has gone down to "Eye of the Tiger" without performance-enhancing drugs.
Drew Curtis
Xi and Putin Caught on Hot Mic Discussing How To Become Immortal
Two dictators walk into eternity… stop me if you’ve heard this one.
Drew Curtis
